I thought and thought...

My family also read this blog.
Fortunately for me, my mom can't read Englsh,much less to read my poor English.

Today,I went to TOKYO INTERNATIONAL FORUM to hear how to study abroad.
I wanna go to London College of Fashion to study woman's foot wear.
Actually, my dream is to be a shoe designer and set up shoe brand.
I have thought for this 2years, but I had no idea to study abroad.
And,ofcoruse,nobody support me any more.(I already graduated from an college of art 3years ago)

I've been working in the field of IT as a designer ,and I'm also proud of my works.
And I'm really happy to have my skills of web design.
But sometimes I feel some kind of emptiness to make web contents.
It's so fluid,and should be keeping change however the design,system,contents, and any other parts are so nice.
Then, people never touch our works by their own finger forever.They can't keep in their hands,either.

Web contents is the thing what just feeling, not keeping.
Or they may be just a tool what we get informations.
User is limited who can connect internet or has PC.

Sometimes I think that I want my works to be live for a long time and everyone can see it.
(Can you understand what I wanna say....? sorry. my poor....)
so, the passion of my dreams(to be a shoe designer), is getting stronger and stronger.
I don't wanna reglet, so I'm gonna go school,next year.
But studying in London is fuckin' too expensive. I'll need at least 10,000,000yen for 3years.(Including living cost).Do you know how much is 1￡ these days?
About 240yen!Unbelievable...
Even if I'll work everyday hardly by next July,It's impossible for me.
ok,for example, another ways to study in London are,

(1)working at shoes factory or company,
----It's too hard to get working visa than to get student visa
and I have no experience to work in the field of foot wear
(2)study at short course or summer course.
----It seems like a hobby ,and too short for me.

.....................I'm going to go to school at shibuya.(there is a school for shoe designer in Shibuya....lucky^^:)
And I have to keep working for living myself.
It's convenient for me the school and my company is very very close.

Someone said me that "you should search for one skill!What do you wanna do? "
I really think so,but I must work and make money for school.
Then, actually, I love web design yet ,and don't wanna leave yet.
Can you follow me that I'll do both web design and shoe design.

I think that I may be so selfish (or egotistical?)
But my life is only one time, so I don't wanna hesitate myself. I'll keep trying.

By the way, I can't deside which school should I go yet.(I know I know..... "UK" is difficult!! )

(This is my new name card　-　for right-handed person lol)